One of the best parts of the past year has been my exploration of subspace. It is truly remarkable where our bodies can take us. Of course, to date, my experience of subspace has been in the passenger seat. Someone else has done the driving, chosen the route taken and speed used, etc. and I've been along for the ride. Now being the passenger is certainly a lovely way to travel. You get to pay attention to the beautiful scenery along the way. You don't have to worry much about getting lost either. As long as you pay attention when the driver requires it, you are pretty much free to indulge in your subspace experience. Of course, all this has got me wondering about what it would be like to do the driving for someone else.
Some folks might ask, "Why would someone who identifies as submissive be interested in topping?" The answer is relatively simple: for the same reason I enjoy reading and writing erotica. I feel there is something to be learned and enjoyed from participating in different aspects of the same process. Just as writing erotica makes me that much more appreciative of the writings of others, I feel that topping will give me a better appreciation for the perspective of the dominant/top/ and submissive/bottom.
Also the notion that my actions could potentially facilitate subspace for another person appeals to the service aspect of my nature. Sometimes as a submissive, I have been passive, simply submitting to what is being offered or accepting of what is being taken. At other times, I have been very active in bringing pleasure to another albeit still within a submissive role. Since I enjoy bringing pleasure to others and want to continue my exploration of subspace, it seems natural to consider the role of top.
In discussions with my Lady, I have begun laying plans regarding how this exploration will unfold. I do not intend to rush; in fact I very much want to savour the process of preparation as this will be a new experience for me. There has already been some discussion about a potential play partner. Of course there will need to be discussion around previous experience, limits, health and safety considerations, etc. I'm looking forward to getting to know the individual's personal preferences and already know these will take me into some new areas, such as wax play and electrical play.
I've already begun to think about location, the mood I wish to create in the play space and how I want it to smell. I'm considering my own appearance as well. Do I wish to appear exotic or severe? How will I speak? What music will I play in the background? I want to fully engage all the senses! I've also begun to consider if there are any aspects of play with which I might want to experiment. For instance, I've always loved having my feet touched so engaging my bottom in foot worship might be something to try.
I paused for a moment and read back what I've written so far. I closed my eyes and got a clear visual of a possible scene. It was de-li-cious! ...The room was candle-lit, fragranced with amber incense. I'm in my favourite corset, stockings and heels. My "guest" is blind-folded, bent at the waist and leaning on a table for support, legs spread and secured. I lean forward, running my fingers though my guest's hair and then grab hold, and whisper in one ear, "Today is the day you learn to fly..."
Can you tell I'm having fun already?
Sunday, March 27, 2011
Friday, March 25, 2011
Sexuality Unconference - Part 2: Subspace Primer
One of the most mysterious terms any newbie will find on the internet relating to BDSM is "subspace." I know when I first joined Fetlife, I spent a fair bit of time trying to discover what this was about by searching newbie discussion threads and asking questions of other members who seemed to know more about it. The explanations I've come across on that site and others tend to fall under two general headings:
1) Scientific - psychological/biological explanations;
2) Qualitative - personal stories of those who have "been there."
Subspace is an altered state of consciousness achieved by a submissive through the process of BDSM "play." Some individuals become immersed in the sensations they are experiencing to the exclusion of all other stimuli and internal information. Others enter a trance like state in which they are no longer conscious of their actions. In both instances, the individual appears to be experiencing a dissociative state.
Unusual behaviour is not uncommon, such as uncontrollable laughter or "zoning out." Individuals in long term relationships often report that they are now in a place where subspace can be triggered easily and quickly. For other kinksters, it is not easily achieved; hence the popularity of the subject on Fetlife. (Submissives swap stories and information about subspace like woman sometimes talk about achieving orgasm.) Some individuals lose all sensation of pain in subspace while others become completely incoherent and can act quite out of character. In short, the submissive enters a vulnerable state and the Dominant's care and attention, both during the scene and afterwards can be crucial to the experience being positive for both parties.
According to the Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders, Fourth Edition (DSM-IV), dissociation is described as "a disruption in the usually integrated functions of consciousness, memory, identity or perception of the environment." Whereas dissociation can be a defensive or protective response to trauma of some kind, the dissociation that occurs in subspace is different as it tends to be triggered at least partly by stimulation and relates to the bio-chemical changes brought on by the physical and the emotional stimulation during a BDSM "scene" or "play session." The experience of pleasure and pain triggers the sympathetic nervous system to release epinephrine, endorphins and enkephalins. The exact cocktail released of course depends on a myriad of individual factors; however, the combination produces that state called "subspace."
Regardless of the information source, there seems to be relative agreement that subspace is an altered state of consciousness. How it is experienced and how it is achieved varies with the individual. One of the biggest challenges of course is trying to describe it to someone who may never have experienced it before. Most newbies want to know how to tell when they are heading into subspace or to figure out if they've already experienced it on some level. For me, it was helpful to relate it to physical/mental states I had already experienced as well as to bodies of knowledge I had already been exposed to previously. Let me explain.
1) Scientific - psychological/biological explanations;
2) Qualitative - personal stories of those who have "been there."
Subspace is an altered state of consciousness achieved by a submissive through the process of BDSM "play." Some individuals become immersed in the sensations they are experiencing to the exclusion of all other stimuli and internal information. Others enter a trance like state in which they are no longer conscious of their actions. In both instances, the individual appears to be experiencing a dissociative state.
Unusual behaviour is not uncommon, such as uncontrollable laughter or "zoning out." Individuals in long term relationships often report that they are now in a place where subspace can be triggered easily and quickly. For other kinksters, it is not easily achieved; hence the popularity of the subject on Fetlife. (Submissives swap stories and information about subspace like woman sometimes talk about achieving orgasm.) Some individuals lose all sensation of pain in subspace while others become completely incoherent and can act quite out of character. In short, the submissive enters a vulnerable state and the Dominant's care and attention, both during the scene and afterwards can be crucial to the experience being positive for both parties.
According to the Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders, Fourth Edition (DSM-IV), dissociation is described as "a disruption in the usually integrated functions of consciousness, memory, identity or perception of the environment." Whereas dissociation can be a defensive or protective response to trauma of some kind, the dissociation that occurs in subspace is different as it tends to be triggered at least partly by stimulation and relates to the bio-chemical changes brought on by the physical and the emotional stimulation during a BDSM "scene" or "play session." The experience of pleasure and pain triggers the sympathetic nervous system to release epinephrine, endorphins and enkephalins. The exact cocktail released of course depends on a myriad of individual factors; however, the combination produces that state called "subspace."
Regardless of the information source, there seems to be relative agreement that subspace is an altered state of consciousness. How it is experienced and how it is achieved varies with the individual. One of the biggest challenges of course is trying to describe it to someone who may never have experienced it before. Most newbies want to know how to tell when they are heading into subspace or to figure out if they've already experienced it on some level. For me, it was helpful to relate it to physical/mental states I had already experienced as well as to bodies of knowledge I had already been exposed to previously. Let me explain.
Sunday, March 20, 2011
Sometimes home-made is the best!
One of the great things about Fetlife is all the pictures and videos that members post on the site. While all members can view pictures posted for public viewing, you need a paid membership in order to access the videos. To be honest, I picked up a paid membership almost immediately as I wanted to support this social networking site devoted to all things kinky. I didn't start to explore the videos until sometime later.
Now, some videos are better than others. Some consist of very brief clips taken with cell phones that capture mere moments. Others look professionally done. There is a broad range of kink represented in the over 1400 videos currently posted there. Every several weeks, I'll take an hour and peruse a while and occasionally I find real pearls; videos that not only capture my undivided attention but also show me something special. Today I found a 30 minute video posted by a Dom that showcased part of a play session. It was in real time and although it was clearly "home-made", I've yet to come across anything that showed as much tenderness.
The setting is a bedroom. A lovely looking woman is sitting on the edge of a wooden chair in front of a bureau, her knees spread apart. She is blind-folded, her wrists are bound behind her, and she is wearing stockings, a white garter belt and heels. Her Dominant, fully clothed sits on the edge of the bed in front of her. He caresses her body, rubbing and plucking her nipples, stroking her legs and arms, and teasing the folds between her legs. He leans forward, caressing her face, then runs his tongue across her parted lips. She strains slightly forward, maintaining her posture, but clearly seeking his mouth. He reaches around her neck with his arm and pulls her closer as they take turns exploring each other's mouths. The kissing in this video is remarkably erotic. There is real chemistry between these two.
A short while later, he eases her up off the chair and turns her around. He buckles a collar around her neck and reseats her so she is straddling the chair, facing the wooden back. He places a pillow against the wooden back and eases her forward so her collar bone and face are resting on it. She scoots down offering up her backside at the edge of the chair. The Dom then pulls out the first of several toys and begins to redden her ass. What I liked about his technique was the way he gradually built up the sensations for her, taking short breaks where he caressed her with his hands or with the flogger.
Eventually he turns her around, facing him. He massages her breasts and crotch with some sort of lubricant. I found myself hoping for her that it was one of those lovely "warming" lubricants you can get. He engages her in some lengthy kissing. Given she is blind-folded the entire time, she can't always anticipate when he is about to take her mouth. I could literally feel the tension building in her. She clearly enjoyed his kisses yet maintained her posture and position.
Now, some videos are better than others. Some consist of very brief clips taken with cell phones that capture mere moments. Others look professionally done. There is a broad range of kink represented in the over 1400 videos currently posted there. Every several weeks, I'll take an hour and peruse a while and occasionally I find real pearls; videos that not only capture my undivided attention but also show me something special. Today I found a 30 minute video posted by a Dom that showcased part of a play session. It was in real time and although it was clearly "home-made", I've yet to come across anything that showed as much tenderness.
The setting is a bedroom. A lovely looking woman is sitting on the edge of a wooden chair in front of a bureau, her knees spread apart. She is blind-folded, her wrists are bound behind her, and she is wearing stockings, a white garter belt and heels. Her Dominant, fully clothed sits on the edge of the bed in front of her. He caresses her body, rubbing and plucking her nipples, stroking her legs and arms, and teasing the folds between her legs. He leans forward, caressing her face, then runs his tongue across her parted lips. She strains slightly forward, maintaining her posture, but clearly seeking his mouth. He reaches around her neck with his arm and pulls her closer as they take turns exploring each other's mouths. The kissing in this video is remarkably erotic. There is real chemistry between these two.
A short while later, he eases her up off the chair and turns her around. He buckles a collar around her neck and reseats her so she is straddling the chair, facing the wooden back. He places a pillow against the wooden back and eases her forward so her collar bone and face are resting on it. She scoots down offering up her backside at the edge of the chair. The Dom then pulls out the first of several toys and begins to redden her ass. What I liked about his technique was the way he gradually built up the sensations for her, taking short breaks where he caressed her with his hands or with the flogger.
Eventually he turns her around, facing him. He massages her breasts and crotch with some sort of lubricant. I found myself hoping for her that it was one of those lovely "warming" lubricants you can get. He engages her in some lengthy kissing. Given she is blind-folded the entire time, she can't always anticipate when he is about to take her mouth. I could literally feel the tension building in her. She clearly enjoyed his kisses yet maintained her posture and position.
Saturday, March 19, 2011
In pursuit of improved health and sex appeal
I'm in my late forties. Until thirteen years ago, I was a svelte 165 - 170 pounds, which on my 5'11" frame looked lovely and healthy. I was about 40" - 30" - 40". I was one of those 30-ish folks who couldn't imagine ever feeling out-of-shape or flabby. Since then, a lot has happened, the sorts of things that drive up your stress level scores - death, divorce, financial crises, health issues, multiple moves and job changes. You get the picture. On top of this, I recently experienced a series of flare-ups of old injuries sustained in past motor vehicle accidents. The result was a gradual decline in my fitness level and the addition of about 35 pounds.
Now at my height, I carry the weight pretty well, but I don't like how I feel. Okay, say some of you - stop feeling sorry for yourself and do something about it. And I have; however, with limited results. The worst of the flare-ups occurred as my fitness level was starting to improve last year. I had been weight-lifting again last summer and had a minor accident early last fall which triggered a host of issues. It was a crushing blow to the old self-esteem to realize the types of exercise I love may no longer be the best options for me.
My eating habits aren't the main issue. I rarely eat after supper and I never skip breakfast. I'm not a junk food fan and we are careful about what we bring into the house. I know my metabolism has slowed a little, but it is my activity level that has gone down. Too many hours at the office and commuting, menopausal hormone shifts and a slower metabolism have combined to drive my weight up slowly for the past thirteen years.
My concern about my weight is driven by two main concerns: the extra weight and family history puts me at risk for diabetes and I don't feel as sexy in my skin anymore. The second factor is huge for me. I sometimes start to feel self-conscious as Lady is winding rope around me, or I catch a glimpse of my nude self in the mirror and am startled by my own reflection. It is not fun at all.
Now I'm not trying to look like I did at age 25 (frankly I was too thin then and fairly flat chested as a result). I want to keep my curves so I'm aiming for the 175 - 180 pound mark. I'd love to be a firm 42" - 32" - 42". I have an image of myself in a leather corset and thong, wearing thigh-high boots and elbow length gloves. There is no extra flesh spilling out anywhere, my arms, thighs and ass are firm. My energy level is improved and I have the stamina for longer play sessions and improved flexibility so I can at least try out some more daring rope work.
Now at my height, I carry the weight pretty well, but I don't like how I feel. Okay, say some of you - stop feeling sorry for yourself and do something about it. And I have; however, with limited results. The worst of the flare-ups occurred as my fitness level was starting to improve last year. I had been weight-lifting again last summer and had a minor accident early last fall which triggered a host of issues. It was a crushing blow to the old self-esteem to realize the types of exercise I love may no longer be the best options for me.
My eating habits aren't the main issue. I rarely eat after supper and I never skip breakfast. I'm not a junk food fan and we are careful about what we bring into the house. I know my metabolism has slowed a little, but it is my activity level that has gone down. Too many hours at the office and commuting, menopausal hormone shifts and a slower metabolism have combined to drive my weight up slowly for the past thirteen years.
My concern about my weight is driven by two main concerns: the extra weight and family history puts me at risk for diabetes and I don't feel as sexy in my skin anymore. The second factor is huge for me. I sometimes start to feel self-conscious as Lady is winding rope around me, or I catch a glimpse of my nude self in the mirror and am startled by my own reflection. It is not fun at all.
Now I'm not trying to look like I did at age 25 (frankly I was too thin then and fairly flat chested as a result). I want to keep my curves so I'm aiming for the 175 - 180 pound mark. I'd love to be a firm 42" - 32" - 42". I have an image of myself in a leather corset and thong, wearing thigh-high boots and elbow length gloves. There is no extra flesh spilling out anywhere, my arms, thighs and ass are firm. My energy level is improved and I have the stamina for longer play sessions and improved flexibility so I can at least try out some more daring rope work.
Sunday, March 13, 2011
Sexuality Unconference: Part 1
On March 26, 2011, our fair city will be the site of a Sexuality Unconference. The organizers, all members of our local TNG Group of kinksters, describe the conference as:
"...an opportunity for the members of various sexuality communities in St John's to come together and share their knowledge in quick paced 20 minute presentations, workshops and discussions. This is a public event - everyone is invited, and everyone is invited to participate! This is not just a kink event!"
At last evening's munch, there was some discussion to generate topics and look for volunteer presenters. Quite an array of topics came forward. Yours truly volunteered to present on two topics:
1) "So now that you know you are kinky, how do you tell your partner/spouse?"
2) Subspace 101: An Altered State of Consciousness
Of course it would be easy to write entire books on either of these so the real challenge is in deciding what to offer in the twenty minute time frame so that experienced kinksters, newbies and the generally curious will leave having gotten something out of it.
My interest in topic #1 is of course, very personal. I kept my own kink buried for decades partly out of fear of rejection by my partner. Now, it would not be fair to say this was the only reason and I think that may be the first point I make in my presentation. Self-acceptance, at least to some degree needs to come first. If a person is not able to acknowledge his/her kinky nature to his/herself, I don't know how you would explain it to another. I know I certainly could not. For a long time, I regarded my desires as deviant, something to be kept in secret buried deep inside myself. Of course one of the casualties here was my libido. This meant my partner wasn't having much fun either.
"...an opportunity for the members of various sexuality communities in St John's to come together and share their knowledge in quick paced 20 minute presentations, workshops and discussions. This is a public event - everyone is invited, and everyone is invited to participate! This is not just a kink event!"
At last evening's munch, there was some discussion to generate topics and look for volunteer presenters. Quite an array of topics came forward. Yours truly volunteered to present on two topics:
1) "So now that you know you are kinky, how do you tell your partner/spouse?"
2) Subspace 101: An Altered State of Consciousness
Of course it would be easy to write entire books on either of these so the real challenge is in deciding what to offer in the twenty minute time frame so that experienced kinksters, newbies and the generally curious will leave having gotten something out of it.
My interest in topic #1 is of course, very personal. I kept my own kink buried for decades partly out of fear of rejection by my partner. Now, it would not be fair to say this was the only reason and I think that may be the first point I make in my presentation. Self-acceptance, at least to some degree needs to come first. If a person is not able to acknowledge his/her kinky nature to his/herself, I don't know how you would explain it to another. I know I certainly could not. For a long time, I regarded my desires as deviant, something to be kept in secret buried deep inside myself. Of course one of the casualties here was my libido. This meant my partner wasn't having much fun either.
Monday, March 7, 2011
The Cougar Chronicles: The Politics of Play
Welcome to another journal entry from "The Cougar Chronicles!" While the heroine's adventures are loosely based on my own, please remember this is a work of fiction.
Several years ago I used to go to a small salon where the owner gave the most amazing shampoos. The water temperature was adjusted to your personal preference, she made sure it was just the way you wanted. She spoke softly to you in her wonderful French Canadian lilt - slipping from accented English to French and back again. She would lather up your hair with some delicious smelling shampoo, working the pads of her fingertips in circles across the scalp. She never missed a spot. When she got to the conditioning, she'd get into some serious scalp massage. By the time my hair was fully rinsed, I was zoned out and completely relaxed. Recognizing my state of mind, she'd offer a chocolate or candy to help ground me so I could get from the shampoo chair to her styling station. She was careful never to rush it and it always took at least ten to fifteen minutes, sometimes longer. She charged well for her services and yes, I tipped her more than I've ever tipped any other stylist. I was always feeling pretty satisfied even before she picked up her scissors. ;-)
This, however, is one of the few hedonistic pleasures we allow ourselves. There are others of course, such as therapeutic massage, manicures/pedicures, saunas, body wraps, and other “treatments” one can choose from the menu of any spa or good quality salon; however, there are tight controls around any such pleasure that involves touch between consenting adults.
Several years ago I used to go to a small salon where the owner gave the most amazing shampoos. The water temperature was adjusted to your personal preference, she made sure it was just the way you wanted. She spoke softly to you in her wonderful French Canadian lilt - slipping from accented English to French and back again. She would lather up your hair with some delicious smelling shampoo, working the pads of her fingertips in circles across the scalp. She never missed a spot. When she got to the conditioning, she'd get into some serious scalp massage. By the time my hair was fully rinsed, I was zoned out and completely relaxed. Recognizing my state of mind, she'd offer a chocolate or candy to help ground me so I could get from the shampoo chair to her styling station. She was careful never to rush it and it always took at least ten to fifteen minutes, sometimes longer. She charged well for her services and yes, I tipped her more than I've ever tipped any other stylist. I was always feeling pretty satisfied even before she picked up her scissors. ;-)
This, however, is one of the few hedonistic pleasures we allow ourselves. There are others of course, such as therapeutic massage, manicures/pedicures, saunas, body wraps, and other “treatments” one can choose from the menu of any spa or good quality salon; however, there are tight controls around any such pleasure that involves touch between consenting adults.
The experience got me thinking about why we associate physical pleasure primarily with the sexual act when there are so many ways to experience pleasure through the senses, and more importantly, why we seem to have so many hang ups about seeking physical pleasures with another consenting adult. Thinking back to the example above, imagine for a moment that I was speaking of having sought the services of a professional Dom/me. Suddenly the concept of seeking service takes on a whole new meaning, and likely a more secretive undertone. The secrecy would likely be needed due to the perception of its very illicit nature, as if the need for a good spanking or to be physically restrained must somehow be more deviant than the need for a good massage or scalp treatment. Having experienced a sound spanking and a painful but satisfying therapeutic massage, I can say with certainty that one is no less meaningful and necessary to the body and the psyche than the other. Given that nether involves ingesting illegal or intoxicating substances, involves no illegal act (provided no money is exchanged for the performance of a sexual act), I actually resent that one is so much harder to obtain than the other. But then it all gets back to what is culturally sanctioned. We in the Western Hemisphere like to think of ourselves as forward thinking; however, our attitudes towards sensual pleasure have a long way to go before they can be truly considered enlightened.
Saturday, March 5, 2011
The Cougar Chronicles: Overcoming Obstacles - A Blast from the Past
Welcome to another fictional journal entry from "The Cougar Chronicles". This chapter was inspired by a discussion thead on fetlife that I read this morning. Hope you enjoy it!
Years ago, long before I had any concept at all of D/s, kink, etc. I found myself in a situation of being asked by my partner of the time to consider a sexual activity that had considerable baggage attached to it from my childhood. What had happened to me as a child was never explained to me before or after. It happened at the hands of trusted adults in a clinical setting, but was a significant violation of my young body and a real test of my trust for the people involved. It was uncomfortable to the point of being painful. I lost control of my bodily functions as a result and was extremely embarrassed afterwards. The response of both adults afterwards was no different than if I had just had my weight checked. What had actually occurred was a doctor with very large hands had stuck two of his very large fingers in my ass in order to conduct an internal examination of my lower bowel and abdomen. Remember, these were the days before CT scans and MRIs. I hadn’t reached puberty and my anal cherry had been popped.
Getting back to the request my young partner had made of me. He didn’t rush me and I gave it much thought. I was not at all coerced and I cared deeply for him so I agreed to try. We were both under 20 and fairly inexperienced so it was not very pleasant for me. In truth it was fairly painful, but I endured and at the end, seemed to have horrified him when he realized I had cried silently through most of it. He held me and comforted me, and then thanked me profusely as he began to understand what had happened and why I didn't ask him to stop. Through the spontaneous aftercare and discussion that followed, I came to feel very different than I had during my first anal experience. This time instead of being embarrassed, I felt his gratitude and love and heard pride in his voice when he talked about what I had been willing to do for him. What a very different experience this was.
Even without the internet, I was able to find some “naughty” books (actually several geared towards gay men) that actually had some practical information about anal sex. I quickly understood that body position, a good lubricant and patience go a long way to ensuring a positive experience for the receiver. Armed with new information and a tube of KY Jelly from the local drug store, I planned a surprise for my then-boyfriend.
Friday, March 4, 2011
The Cougar Chronicles: Making Kinky Friends
This is another journal entry about the life of our ficitional heroine, a "Cougar" exploring her sexuality and kinkiness, bless her. Her stories are loosely based on my own experiences, things I"ve read, etc. Of course her life is far more interesting than mine. Please remember, this is a work of fiction. <smile>
There are many reasons that my favourite website is also a favourite of so many other people. Some folks use the site as a platform to soft-sell services or products from porn to vacuum pumps to leather goods. Others use it as a platform form to express their viewpoints and some of these individuals live in places where their kink could get them arrested or worse. Others like it because here they can use all those dirty little words you can’t use in polite company. Some love it for the naughty games like “fuck or pass”, where you view the profile of the person who posts above you in the discussion thread and decide whether you would fuck them or pass. Where else can you exercise your exhibitionist streak and post nude or semi-nude pictures of yourself and have someone send you feedback that they love the contrast of your painted finger nails against the pale skin of your breasts? In short, it provides a powerful and validating outlet for thoughts and images that might never be otherwise shared.
It’s an odd sort of culture this website. While it is acceptable to set up and play games like “fuck or pass” and “spank or pass”, to post pictures of erections, pierced labia and bruised thighs, it is not considered good form to be openly predatory in correspondence with strangers. Most folks I’ve encountered thus far have been polite, open-minded and more than willing to share their thoughts and experiences. I love the civility of this. You’re also not allowed to bash other people for their beliefs and certain things are utterly forbidden – no kiddie porn here whatsoever. No doubt, this helps contribute to the relatively comfortable atmosphere in most of the discussion threads I’ve viewed and helps to “normalize” things. This doesn’t mean that all correspondence has been pleasant. Occasionally my path has crossed with trollers ; that is, those who smell fresh meat and are drawn to it.
My first less than pleasant encounter was with someone that I had met previously on another website before I found this one. He was friendly enough at first but got a little pushy and opinionated with me quickly, scolding me for the content of my posts, etc. My initial reaction was quite strong. Besides being pissed off, I was taken aback at how his comments undermined my confidence. I went cold, responding briefly but giving him one more chance to redeem himself, in case there had been some mistake. When he squandered that opportunity, I blocked his ass (translated – I hit the block button preventing him from contacting me directly again).
Then there was the first time I received an unsolicited message from someone whose user name I had never heard of before in any discussion or group I had joined, whose only profile picture was one of an erect penis. Now don’t get me wrong, I have no problems looking at an erect cock. I actually like looking at pictures of penises, erect or otherwise. It is the one part of the male anatomy that remains so well hidden in mainstream media. If you are lucky to actually get a glimpse then it is usually flaccid. It’s actually nice to see still pictures of male genitalia, out of context so they don’t provoke the typical physical response (at least not immediately). One can take her time and just look for the aesthetic pleasure of it. <sigh>
Tuesday, March 1, 2011
Sling-backs and Stockings
My favourite shoes are a pair of red patent sling-backs. They look so sexy especially when paired with black fishnet stockings. Next to these, are a pair of black leather t-straps. These are comfortable for every day and make my legs look amazingly long. I never feel as good as I do when I'm wearing my favourite fishnet stockings and a sexy pair of shoes.Tonight, because I was bored with television and Lady was busy, I ventured upstairs and engaged in a little dress up play. I pulled out my stockings and several pairs of shoes and did a little photo shoot to amuse myself. It was more fun than I expected! I found myself thinking "I still like playing dress up." <blush>
My Lady is fond of my legs and encourages my shoe and stocking indulgences. This means I have her permission to play "dress-up" like this whenever I want. And of course, this makes me one very lucky pet!
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