Tuesday, February 28, 2012

Contemplating Subtleties

Modified Dragonfly
While the pictures I'm sharing today are all about rope, I want to post about the "other" stuff that the pictures couldn't capture.

This past weekend, Pet and I attended a rope practice session at a friend's house.  It was a casual, intimate affair.  It was one of those rare opportunities for Pet and I to engage in some of our favorite activities in the company of others.  We both love bondage so we were excited to get a chance to practice; however, we had practiced during our own play sessions the two evenings before.  What made this different?

Camaraderie was one aspect that made it special.  It's great to watch what others do, to see what their "process" is and to witness the results.  It's also stimulating to watch how rope tops and bottoms interact and to witness a bottom go to her "happy place."  For Pet and I, it was also an opportunity just be Keeper and Pet in a public way.

Rope corset
We haven't had many opportunities to do this over the past eleven months.  Our play sessions have been private and most of our social activities (outside of time spent with Lady and I) have been in vanilla venues.  Any references to our Keeper/Pet relationship have been fairly discrete.

On Sunday evening we were in the company of others, yet we could relax and be ourselves, with me referring to him as "Pet" and him calling me "M'am."  I sent him to the kitchen to prepare my cup of coffee and it was entirely natural.  We gently teased each other, like we would have playing in my private studio.  At one point I retrieved a key from my bag and told him to release himself from a discrete restraint that we'd put in place hours before, and did so without a second thought.  I hand fed him snacks.  I eventually hogtied him and then proceeded to chat with the others, gently stroking him so I could monitor his skin temperature, while he blissed out on the sheep skin I'd placed under him.

Hogtied and happy again!
The following day, one of the participants messaged me and commented how great it has been to watch our Keeper/Pet relationship evolve over the past year.  This sort of peer validation and support is so very wonderful.  I guess it is no different from any other sort of relationship in that both parties not only want acceptance and validation from each other, but also from the wider community of which they are a part. This is important in any case, but I believe even more so when  the relationship is non-conventional and flies in the face of society's norms.

I know what it is like to be in an non-conventional relationship and have no social supports.  It is very isolating and at times, can be little scary.  I can remember what it was like for Lady and I to be the token "odd" couple in a very small community.  Very few people were brave enough to befriend us and those that did got asked the rudest and most ignorant questions.  We didn't go out much and rarely went anywhere alone.

In contrast, these days I am blessed to belong to a vanilla community that is much more relaxed about the unconventional nature of my primary relationship.  Of course now there is another important relationship in my life: the one I have with my Pet.  My vanilla community is aware that a wonderful young man visits Lady and I frequently and to date has been content to mind its own business.  The three of us are often seen enjoying each other's company and having a great time wherever we go together.  But Pet and I have had few opportunities outside the play room or our home (i.e. Lady's and mine) to let down our guard and just be Pet and Keeper.  Happily, it looks like we will soon have more chances.  It looks like rope night could become a semi-regular event in our local kink community and there is talk of a play party in the near future too.

I am proud to be his Keeper.  I feel it is my responsibility to demonstrate this whenever I can and especially when we are in  the company of like-minded folk.  He needs to know that I value his surrender, obedience and gratitude both in and out of the playroom and expect him to conduct himself appropriately, as my Pet, whether he is clothed and sitting opposite me in a food court or half naked on the floor tied in rope.  By fulfilling my role as his Keeper in public, I also show him that I am not ashamed of my desire for control of him; in fact I revel in it!

So, as you now know, there was a lot going on for me on Sunday evening that had precious little to do with rope!  As the pictures show, there was much rope work that evening.  We had a great time and are looking forward to our next local gathering.

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