Tuesday, March 20, 2012

Embracing the Inner Sadist

I have discovered that I truly enjoy inflicting sensations that make my Pet gasp, flinch, moan and shiver. It's not just because I know he likes this sort of activity. No, that would be altogether too altruistic of me and it wouldn't be the whole truth. While I do love to help him fly, I also love watching the myriad of expressions I can provoke. They appeal to me on a very visceral level. 
Sometimes I am in awe. Sometimes, my own breath catches in my chest. Sometimes I tingle all over. I feel a sense of power surge through me and I want to see more!  The rawness of his expressions feed a part of me that I didn't know existed until now.
<cough, cough>
My that was a bit of an outburst, wasn't it? But there it is! I am more than a gleeful sadist, as Pet first called me. Of course, the gleeful sadist was an easy character to embrace. This new one is darker, but far more interesting.
So who else out there has met their inner sadist and how are you coming to terms with him/her? What thrills you about this aspect of yourself? What scares the crap out of you?

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