Both my Beloved and my dear Pet have had new people move into their lives. While the nature of these relationships have been different, they have provided me with opportunity to examine my own feelings and to practice the unconditional loving I receive from both of them.
Sometimes it has been relatively easy and compersion abounds. I am genuinely glad when they relate to me a story about how another person has made them smile or evoked strong loving feelings in them. I am honored that they feel comfortable enough to share these anecdotes with me and I want them to know that what makes them happy, makes me happy for them.
Other times, it has been more challenging. There have been times when I've had concerns and have had to work at minding my own business. At those moments, I find I have to remind myself that my loved ones are adults and are quite capable of making their own choices. I have to have faith that they know what is best for them.
The most challenging moments have been when I see one of my loved ones hurting because of the actions of another. Protectiveness surges and I have to admit to having had fleeting desires to kick someone's butt. I quickly shift to focusing on supporting my loved ones and only offering my own perspectives, carefully, and preferably only when asked.
Now you could argue that these approaches lend themselves well to many family situations of a non-polyamourous nature, and this would be true. Of course, most of us are taxed to love pets, children and siblings unconditionally, let alone multiple romantic partners. I know I've read about similar circumstances in the lives of others and had wondered how I would fare when confronted with similar challenges. Fortunately, so far, I think I'm managing. I just hope my loved ones agree.
Having two people in my life has made me very conscious of how I love. Embarking on this polyamorous adventure has had its ups and downs (for all of us), I can honestly say it has been worth the effort, heart ache and (sometimes) tears, and we continue to grow as individuals and as a family.